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Friday, October 26, 2012

Cell Phone Used with Bad Manners.....I'm fed up!

Okay, I know we live in a technological world. I love computers and spend more time on them than I should but, I know when to get off. When I have company, I stay off my computer and turn the television off. I never ever answer the phone during dinner nor do  I sit with a cell phone checking out Facebook, sending text messages, or reading them.

Lately, and often, my husband and I have witnessed groups of people sitting in a restaurant together and each and every person has a cell phone in hand and their attention seems to be on what they see on that little screen. It's sad to see so many people not enjoying each other and communicating the way a group of people going to dinner should be communicating.

We see people whom think they are paying attention to their driving. If you ask most people whom frequently use mobile phone when driving, they will swear up and down they can totally focus on their driving and don't pose a danger to others. In my observations, this is not true! Often, I wonder if they even notice the accidents they almost caused. I really hate to see a car with children in it, and see a mom or dad, chatting away, or looking downward to read a text.

Seriously, is it this important to have a mobile phone that needs such constant attention. I understand where mobile phones are important and can be very useful. If a person is on call, have their children with a child care provider, or need to have it on because of an important phone call. Do they really need to whip them out at social gatherings like dinner with family or friends?

This is one fed up MOM! I am witnessing our own family members and friends with bad cell phone manners. Oh yes, they are. Whether I go out to dinner with our family and friends or invite them to our home for dinner, I expect to see them, as adults, to mind their manners and NOT come to a table with cell phone in hand, constantly looking downward to read or doing the one hand text a message thing, Yes, they are proficient enough to look downward and text with one hand. Why should they be proficient, they eat, sleep, and drink with it. They now know their phones better than their friends and family.

I've taken a stand for cell phone etiquette, dinner table manners, and in the hopes of making the dinner table a place for socializing between humans whom should be conversing; I've made a sign. This sign is proudly displayed on our buffet table. It's not a small sign. Do you think perhaps the people whom I love and enjoy THEIR company will get the message and realize, phones should never get in the way of real human socializing and conversations.

It seems as this World's technology will make people further apart than bring them together. When people decide that looking at their Facebook, browsing the internet, playing games, reading or sending texts is more important than enjoying the communion of a family/friend dinner; something is wrong.

Oh, I also saw a picture my dear friend had posted at her last year's family Christmas gathering. Every single person in the picture was looking at their mobile phones. All I can say is; "A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words.". Time for me to stop venting and post the picture of my new framed sign. The "Bear Heart" graphics are by Lorie Furnell.

I close this post with a little scenario my husband and I witnessed at a McDonald's playground we had taken our grandchildren to play.

A little boy runs up to his mom in total excitement calling out; "Mom, mom! should see what I can do. Mommy do you want to see?" the mother with her head downwards looking at her cell phone just kept on looking at it with her complete and total attention. the little boy call out again; "Mommy, mom, do you want to see?...huh? " The woman lifts her head for a second and say; " Just a minute sweet heart." then the little boy says; "Oh mommy, you have to see, I can do this!"...again, the mom looks down at her phone, then briefly looks up, and in a not so nice tone says; " I said, just a minute. " the boy looks away towards the playground, then back to his mom and stands by her side patiently awaiting. Several minutes later, he asks; " Mom, are you done yet?" she replies, " Did I tell you just a minute!" he looks downward and defeated. He walks away and begins to play on the playground. Over a half hour has passed, and this mom never gave her child the moment he had pleaded to have. They left. As the mom walked out with her son, she held her mobile phone tightly in her hand and looked at it more often than her won child. This gave me such a feeling of anger but even more sadness.


  1. You already know that I am in complete agreement with you. I gave up my super expensive smart phone for a Jitterbug that costs less than $20 a month for my allotted 50 minutes of time. Yes, per month! No internet, no email, no texting, and it is for MY emergency use only. I call it my freedom phone! No one has the number except my husband and kids. No one can call me on it, either. I don't allow phones at the table, and when my visiting son comes over tomorrow to watch the big game with his dad, I'll ask him to put it away. He'll need to tend his baby daughter anyway, because I'll be painting the front door, inside and out, the railing outside, and installing new weather stripping. As you know, I also hate the fact that texting language is ruining our language with its abbreviated words and acronyms. No one can even write a complete sentence anymore. Words like "wanna" and "gonna" have replaced "want to" and "going to", and I hate things like that. Those who choose to use such ugly manners of speech will one day be shocked that their child can't get a good job or pass a college entrance exam. Corporations and universities are experiencing such a huge influx of dumbed-down students so severely affected by a lack of reading, writing, and speaking skills that they cannot begin to compete for jobs. Texting and using what I call baby talk truly hampers one's ability to maintain good communication skills. Ask any good high school or college-level instructor about what they are experiencing in the classroom, and they'll surely tell you how badly our language skills are deteriorating. I can provide documentation if anyone is interested. The dumbing down of America and American students has got to stop. We are no longer able to compete in the world, and our economy reflects that, as more and more manufacturing jobs go to China. Our kids need more math, more science, outstanding writing skills, and a lot fewer phones.

  2. Thanks Lynda and Barbara, It's nice to know others feel the same way. I thought perhaps I was letting this cell phone mania bother me too much. Honestly, it truly concerns me about the future of our children and their social, English skills. Barbara, I totally agree with you. It's as though texts are creating a whole new acronym language and a pathetic language too. Instead of "are you" my hubby read a message from a friend that read "r u going 2 the game?" ridiculous!

  3. Well said! So many of us share your sentments. Thanks for putting it out there. PS LOVE THE SIGN! hugs, eileen

  4. Ditto your sentiments, Debbie. Love the sign, I'm sure your family and friends will get the message.

  5. I feel really sad to see people are not going to know to be connected with the ones they love.

  6. Amen, sister! I am so tired of going to restaurants, walking down the street or shopping and either have to listen to endless silly phone conversations (why do people have to yell into those phones) or having to dodge people who are walking while looking down at that silly screen. I, too, have an old-fashioned cell phone and it is in use only for emergencies. Very little is so important that I have to talk on the phone when I'm not at home!

    Love, love the sign. Hubby is threatening to walk into restaurants with it!

  7. Thank you everyone for leaving a comment. It's s nice to know I'm not alone with my feelings about the changes the over use of cell phones has made in our socialization and communication skills and manner.

    Debbie J, I'm thinking about cutting some heat transfer vinyl with the words on the sign to place on a shirt to wear to every restaurant my hubby and I visit. I like the way your hubby thinks. :)

  8. Hi, Debbie! You probably are not going to believe this, but I DO NOT even have a cell phone. People are shocked when I tell them that. They have no idea how I live without one. And...I have no idea what all people have to talk about every second of every day!

    I am in total agreement with you! I, too, see people using their phones instead of paying attention to their kids. I feel so sorry for those kids! I've told my husband that they are teaching their kids to ignore them. One day when they need their kids to help or pay attention they will say, Just a minute Mom or Dad!!!! What goes around comes around.

    When my granddaughter emails I have to ask what she means. She laughs at me for taking the time to type everything out. I told her I don't want to get into the habit of not spelling everything out. I want whomever I'm communicating with to understand and not have to guess or ask what I meant.

    I love your sign and certainly hope your family and friends get the message. Please post one of your great videos on You Tube. I'm hoping this will spread like wildfire over the internet like everything else does. In a way it's funny and in a way it's sad that you would even have to make a sign like that.

    Becky Jo

  9. A huge AMEN to everything that has been said here!!! I get so fed up with all the stupid conversations that I'm a part of, and really don't want to be, just because I happen to be shopping in the same store as 'the cell phone user' who can't get their shopping done without yakking the whole time on the phone. It took everything in me to keep my mouth shut one day in Joanne's when I could hear a lady on the next aisle talking on her phone. We both ended up covering most of the store, and she never did get off her phone! I have lots of family that are just like what has been described here. In fact, I told my son the other day that he needs to 'unplug' his kids if he wants to get them to see what is real in life. They are clueless, and it makes me sad and angry.
    I agree that you need to make a YouTube video so I can post it on my Facebook.

  10. Arggg, lost my last email.

    I have seen my share of cell phone "users" while driving myself, its a serious thing. I think the frightening thing is how SELFISH it is, they might wipe themselves out, but worse, take some innocents with them.

    I agree with the use during any sort of events, whether it be family time, church, appointments etc. I think many people are totally addicted to their phones and their addictions should be treated as such. So sad.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    Have a super weekend!

    ♥ Barb

  11. Way to go Debbie. Manners are becoming a thing of the past.

  12. Mom's sound out through art, lol, so love this, and it is good to take note that when mom is not happy, no one is happy, hugs

  13. I agree I until recently worked retail and thought it was so sad that little kids don't have this shopping time with Moms attention , they are in cart right in front of her, looking at her. She is talking on the cell phone usually, I guess texting is a little bit hard pushing a cart
    I have the same rules at the table as you want, I am so glad to see you post this I thougth it was my age, I am 69. That doesn't mean I was going to have it at the table it just means I thought it was my age. lol. Thank you for posting this at this time of year, maybe somone will have a better Thanksgiving because of it. Dotty

  14. I totally agree with this post! I work in a medical clinic and you would not BELIEVE how many people are on their cell phones while we are attempting to get information relevent to their treatment in the exam room! Many times we just leave the room, put their chart at the back of the rack and go on to the next patient (and the next, and the next.) If you don't have "time" to talk to us, we don't have "time" for you.

    Just last week, I had a patient who would not put down her Kindle long enough for me to do her x-ray exam. It was extremely frustrating trying to position her when she wouldn't pay attention to my instructions. I felt like turning up the exposure settings and frying the heck out of her and her Kindle. Of course, since I'm a professional, I did no such thing, but the thought sure crossed my mind. :)

    Thanks for the gentle reminder that real, live, face to face people are vastly more important than facebook ever could be.

  15. Oh I so agree with you on this issue! I have a daughter-in-law who LIVES on her cell phone. The only way I could reach her was to go out and get a cell phone which included texting!! We are considering an intervention with her - LOL! But, seriously, using these things while driving is absolutely foolish and dangerous! I will be glad when laws are in place preventing their use! TFS!


  16. You are right, mobile phones has changed our lives completely, we are not even concentrating on food items while eating.

    Mobile Phones

  17. It seems like each day comes with another story of the inappropriate use of cell phones. Those whom use them while driving need to be more responsible. I pray for the day they make a law in our state, prohibiting the use of cell phones while driving. Many will still break the law because they are too confident, they are in total concentration with their driving and pose no danger. I guess the rudeness of many will be what we will inevitably have to deal with since most feel as though they have to just take it. A law will certainly help but not put an end to those whom are inconsiderate and lack manners.

    Kraftychick, there are a whole lot of people I know whom could use intervention. Good luck everyone. I hope we all can help change things. xxx- Debbie

  18. This is absolutely THE BEST post I've read in a long time. I so totally agree with you on everything you said. You expressed my thoughts much better than I ever could. It's insulting to be in a restaurant with friends, and have them get on the phone (I'm not talking an emergency call either!). I just cannot understand how society in general have become so 'joined at the hip' with a tool that was created for other emergencies! ...and has become a social necessity. What on earth do these people have to TALK about that is SO IMPORTANT! My life must be pretty dull, because emergency calls aside, I just don't have that much for which I must constantly be on the cell phone! Thanks for this post! Needed to be said. Love your sign.


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